Grapes of Laugh Fundraiser & TheatreSports Giveawayby
Vancouver TheatreSports League presents the 5th annual Grapes of Laugh fundraiser tomorrow night. The event will involve tastings of some of New Zealand’s finest wines, silent auctions, live auctions, and improv performances by the Vancouver TheatreSports players.
The fundraising aspect supports community and youth programs year-round. From the organizers:
“Each year, we send performers to Childrenâ€™s Hospital to provide comedy improv shows to those kids and their families who do not have the luxury of seeing our work at our theatre. VTSL Community Outreach also includes our Youth Programs (Teen Improv Camps and providing complimentary tickets to organizations such as Big Sisters, Big Brothers, Kids Upfront, and other Kids-At-Risk programs), as well as performing for over 30,000 school children across British Columbia each year.”
Tickets are still available for $65 and the event will be hosted by CBC’s Fred Lee.
I have always wanted to catch a TheatreSports event so I’m very pleased to partner with them to give away five pairs of tickets to an upcoming performance night. The group has nightly themes such as “rookie night”, “improv musical”, and “late night mixer”. You can view a full monthly schedule of VTSL events online.
Laughter has such power to connect, cross language barriers, and even to heal. To enter to win one of these pairs of tickets to Vancouver TheatreSports, please leave a comment on this post with your best joke (try to keep it as clean as possible, if you can). It can be an ‘oldie but a goodie’, knock-knock style, from a movie, or something your 3-year old invented.
I will draw five winners (who will each get a pair of tickets) on Wednesday November 10th at 12:00pm. Follow @VanTheatreSports on Twitter for their latest news and updates.
Update The five pass winners are: Marina, Chris, Greg, Stephen and Liz. Have a fantastic laugh-filled time at Vancouver Theatre Sports!
49 Comments — Comments Are Closed
This is a fun event for a great cause, I hope I get to attend.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.
I know…that’s awful… 🙂
Where did the spaghetti go to dance?
“The Meat Ball”…ha haa..:o)
There are three types of people – those who can count and those who can’t.
What kind of hair does a moose have??
lol i love it!
“what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ” long pause, serious face…. “where’s my tractor?”… my 4 year old LOVES this
A family of tomatoes were walking down the street. The baby tomato was slow so the dad tomato bopped him on the head and said “ketchup!”
Where does a pirate keep his bucaneers?
Under his bucan-hat!
(say it aloud….)
Two jokes for the price of one (which is still free):
1. Statistics lie 120% of the time.
2. It’s a sad day when our politicians are comical and we have to take our comedians seriously.
A couple of Chilliwack hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: â€œMy friend is dead! What can I do?â€
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: â€œJust take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.â€ There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: â€œOK, now what?â€œ
What did the bra say to the hat?
I’ll give these two a lift, you go on ahead!
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those how understand binary and those who don’t.
two muffins are baking in the oven… one turns to the other and says “boy it’s hot in here!” other muffin responds “OMG A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!
The key to looking young is running … running away from responsibility.
Why’d the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead…
(Favourite joke as a 4th grader…)
So, a neutron walked into a bar and said “Iâ€™d like a beer, please.”
After the bartender gave him one, he said “How much will that be?”
“For you?” said the bartender “No charge.”
A young Swedish woman, old Dutch woman, an Englishman, and an Irishman are riding a train…
The train goes through a tunnel and it becomes pitch black in the car, a loud SMACK is heard… the train emerges from the tunnel and the Englishman is rubbing his cheek.
The Swedish girl thinks “I bet he tried to grope me and accidentally got the old woman and she slapped him…”
The Dutch woman thinks “He must have groped the Swedish girl and she slapped him…”
The Englishman thinks “The Irishman must have groped the Swedish girl and she accidentally slapped me…”
And the Irishman thinks “I can’t wait for another tunnel so I can smack that English guy again.”
What the Elephant say to the naked man?….
“How do you eat with that thing?!”
Top reason to see Theatre Sports:
Its cheaper than the canucks!
We’d meant to check out the Vancouver TheatreSports. So we’d love to win some tickets. 🙂
We’ve meant to check out the TheatreSports. So we’d love to win some tickets. 🙂
A man walks into a bar…and says ouch!
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
What do you call cheese that’s not yours?
“Nacho cheese” (sounds like “not your cheese”).
Five year olds crack up everytime!
“Why do trees lean to the east? Because the (Maple) Leaves Suck”
Wooot wooot 🙂
Knock knock. Whos There? Horspuh. Horsepuh. Who? HAHA made you say horsepoo!
Kids love it!
why was the tomato blushing? because he saw the salad dressing!
Reed between the lines.
My dad used to tell me this joke….he started it with…”wanna hear a dirty joke?” to which i always replied “YES!!” with anticipation since i was not allowed to hear dirty jokes with out “earmuffs” on….
A white horse fell in a mud puddle….
aaaaaaand i fell for it again….
So a Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel down his pants. The bartender says, “Hey Buddy, didja know you have a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?!” And the Pirate says,
“Arrggggh! It’s driving me nuts!”
What did the fish say when he hit the wall?
My Grandfather used to tell this one What do you call 3 holes in the ground?
Well Well Well
Did you hear about the new pirate movie?
It’s rated ARRRRR!
What did one math book say to the other math book?
” Do you want to hear my problems?”
A man is in his house.
It’s late at night.
There’s a knock at the door.
It’s a snail.
The snail says, “I’d like to talk to you about buying magazine subscriptions.”
The man is furious he’s been interrupted.
He rears back, kicks the snail as hard as he can.
Slams the door and goes back to bed.
Two years later he’s getting ready for bed and there’s a knock at the door.
He answers it.
The snail goes “What the HECK WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?”
two muffins are baking in the ovenâ€¦ one turns to the other and says â€œboy itâ€™s hot in here!â€ other muffin responds â€œOMG A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!
Two women friends had gone for a girl’s night out; both were very faithful and loving wives…however, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers.
Incredibly drunk & walking home they needed to pee, so they stopped in the cemetery. One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend however was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them, but was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that. After the girls did their business, they proceeded to go home.
The next day one of the women’s husbands was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said, “These girl’s nights have got to stop! I’m starting to suspect the worst…my wife came home with no panties!”
“That’s nothing,” said the other husband, “Mine came back with a card stuck between the crack of her bum that said, ‘From all of us at the Fire Station. We’ll never forget you.'”
There were five people on a plain, the pilot, a priest, a lawyer, a doctor and a little boy. The engines starts to have trouble and the pilot says, â€œwe are going down boysâ€ takes one of the 4 parachutes and jumps, the rest look at each other and the doctor says, â€œI have many lives to save besides my ownâ€ and jumps…the lawyer says, â€œwell I am one of the smartest men in the worldâ€ so he grabs a pack and jumps….the priest looks at the little boy and says, â€œmy son I have lived a long life you save yourselfâ€ and the little boy says “thatâ€™s okay the smartest man in the world grabbed my back pack.”
When a clock is hungry it goes back for seconds…
When a chicken crosses the road it is polty in motion…
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
How do you know your 2 year old is happy?
When he grunts, grunts again, grunts louder ….
And then says “Ahhhhhhhhh”… after a big pooo.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Not-yo cheese!
Was going to go with the “Nacho cheese!” joke but it seems that several other hilarious people have beat me to it…
Everytime I log onto the seven dwarfs website my computer screen goes snow white….
Two peanuts walk into the subway, one was a-salted!
Recent story came out that when the miners in Chile were first contacted via the emergency drill hole, the trapped men said that they’d be okay but in order to pass time all the needed was
32 long straws
1 short straw
and one little black dress
Husband says; “When I’m gone you’ll never find another man like me”.
Wife replied; “What makes you think I’d want another man like you!”
What do you call someone elses cheese?